Ex-wife still
controls him
RelationshipsComments Dear Bunmi, I met my husband five years ago when he was separated from his wife. As soon as his divorce went through, we got married and his 16-year-old son now lives with us. He rarely sees his mother and she seldom calls him. They also have a 17-year-old daughter who opted to live with her mother. I’ve always been pleasant to her when she calls, yet she refuses to meet me. Her brother accepts me, so why can’t she? I’ve lost the will to be nice to her. After her calls, my husband tells me what she’s been up to, but I can’t be bothered to show any interest. His ex-wife has now started to ring him more often. She always wants him to solve one problem or the other, especially about their daughter. She was the one who caused an end to the marriage. In a few weeks, the daughter will be IS and she’s made plans for an elaborate birthday party in her house. His ex and their daughter are always asking for money and my husband is too soft to say no, despite knowing how upset this makes me. I don’t know what to do. Am I being unreasonable? I know my husband loves me, but having his ex around is making me unhappy. Demi, by e-mail. Dear Demi, A man needs to distance himself from his ex if he is to form a strong relationship with someone new. Although your husband divorced his wife, they remain emotionally tied and each would like to get over their hurt. The children too wouldn’t say no to reconciliation. You have walked into a family’s mess and it’s no wonder you feel insecure. Something has to give. The victims here are the two adolescent children who ‘re confused and harmed by the divorce. Do not think of them, or judge them as you would two adults. They’re insecure teenagers and you need to help them maintain good relationships with their parents. If the daughter remains hostile, grin and bear it. Forgive her resentment of a new wife who has intruded into her parents’ broken relationship. By trying to love your husband’s children you will strengthen the loyalty and affection he now gives you. Let him realise he needs to place more emphasis on your relationship instead of running to his ex at the slightest opportunity. Time, though, will sort this mess out and your soon-to-be-IS step-daughter will mellow once she starts committed dating.
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-h Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-him/
RelationshipsComments Dear Bunmi, I met my husband five years ago when he was separated from his wife. As soon as his divorce went through, we got married and his 16-year-old son now lives with us. He rarely sees his mother and she seldom calls him. They also have a 17-year-old daughter who opted to live with her mother. I’ve always been pleasant to her when she calls, yet she refuses to meet me. Her brother accepts me, so why can’t she? I’ve lost the will to be nice to her. After her calls, my husband tells me what she’s been up to, but I can’t be bothered to show any interest. His ex-wife has now started to ring him more often. She always wants him to solve one problem or the other, especially about their daughter. She was the one who caused an end to the marriage. In a few weeks, the daughter will be IS and she’s made plans for an elaborate birthday party in her house. His ex and their daughter are always asking for money and my husband is too soft to say no, despite knowing how upset this makes me. I don’t know what to do. Am I being unreasonable? I know my husband loves me, but having his ex around is making me unhappy. Demi, by e-mail. Dear Demi, A man needs to distance himself from his ex if he is to form a strong relationship with someone new. Although your husband divorced his wife, they remain emotionally tied and each would like to get over their hurt. The children too wouldn’t say no to reconciliation. You have walked into a family’s mess and it’s no wonder you feel insecure. Something has to give. The victims here are the two adolescent children who ‘re confused and harmed by the divorce. Do not think of them, or judge them as you would two adults. They’re insecure teenagers and you need to help them maintain good relationships with their parents. If the daughter remains hostile, grin and bear it. Forgive her resentment of a new wife who has intruded into her parents’ broken relationship. By trying to love your husband’s children you will strengthen the loyalty and affection he now gives you. Let him realise he needs to place more emphasis on your relationship instead of running to his ex at the slightest opportunity. Time, though, will sort this mess out and your soon-to-be-IS step-daughter will mellow once she starts committed dating.
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-h Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-him/
His ex-wife still
controls him
On May 30, 201710:00 pmIn RelationshipsComments
Dear Bunmi,
I met my husband five years ago when he was separated from his wife. As
soon as his divorce went through, we got married and his 16-year-old son
now lives with us. He rarely sees his mother and she seldom calls him.
They also have a 17-year-old daughter who opted to live with her mother.
I’ve always been pleasant to her when she calls, yet she refuses to
meet me. Her brother accepts me, so why can’t she? I’ve lost the will to
be nice to her. After her calls, my husband tells me what she’s been up
to, but I can’t be bothered to show any interest.
His ex-wife has now started to ring him more often. She always wants him
to solve one problem or the other, especially about their daughter. She
was the one who caused an end to the marriage.
In a few weeks, the daughter will be IS and she’s made plans for an
elaborate birthday party in her house. His ex and their daughter are
always asking for money and my husband is too soft to say no, despite
knowing how upset this makes me. I don’t know what to do.
Am I being unreasonable? I know my husband loves me, but having his ex
around is making me unhappy.
Demi, by e-mail.
Dear Demi,
A man needs to distance himself from his ex if he is to form a strong
relationship
with someone new. Although your husband divorced his wife, they remain
emotionally tied and each would like to get over their hurt. The
children too wouldn’t say no to reconciliation.
You have walked into a family’s mess and it’s no wonder you feel
insecure. Something has to give. The victims here are the two adolescent
children who ‘re confused and harmed by the divorce. Do not think of
them, or judge them as you would two adults. They’re insecure teenagers
and you need to help them maintain good relationships with their
parents.
If the daughter remains hostile, grin and bear it. Forgive her
resentment of a new wife who has intruded into her parents’ broken
relationship. By trying to love your husband’s children you will
strengthen the loyalty and affection he now gives you.
Let him realise he needs to place more emphasis on your relationship
instead of
running to his ex at the slightest opportunity. Time, though, will sort
this mess out and your soon-to-be-IS step-daughter will mellow once she
starts committed dating.
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-him/
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-him/
His ex-wife still
controls him
On May 30, 201710:00 pmIn RelationshipsComments
Dear Bunmi,
I met my husband five years ago when he was separated from his wife. As
soon as his divorce went through, we got married and his 16-year-old son
now lives with us. He rarely sees his mother and she seldom calls him.
They also have a 17-year-old daughter who opted to live with her mother.
I’ve always been pleasant to her when she calls, yet she refuses to
meet me. Her brother accepts me, so why can’t she? I’ve lost the will to
be nice to her. After her calls, my husband tells me what she’s been up
to, but I can’t be bothered to show any interest.
His ex-wife has now started to ring him more often. She always wants him
to solve one problem or the other, especially about their daughter. She
was the one who caused an end to the marriage.
In a few weeks, the daughter will be IS and she’s made plans for an
elaborate birthday party in her house. His ex and their daughter are
always asking for money and my husband is too soft to say no, despite
knowing how upset this makes me. I don’t know what to do.
Am I being unreasonable? I know my husband loves me, but having his ex
around is making me unhappy.
Demi, by e-mail.
Dear Demi,
A man needs to distance himself from his ex if he is to form a strong
relationship
with someone new. Although your husband divorced his wife, they remain
emotionally tied and each would like to get over their hurt. The
children too wouldn’t say no to reconciliation.
You have walked into a family’s mess and it’s no wonder you feel
insecure. Something has to give. The victims here are the two adolescent
children who ‘re confused and harmed by the divorce. Do not think of
them, or judge them as you would two adults. They’re insecure teenagers
and you need to help them maintain good relationships with their
parents.
If the daughter remains hostile, grin and bear it. Forgive her
resentment of a new wife who has intruded into her parents’ broken
relationship. By trying to love your husband’s children you will
strengthen the loyalty and affection he now gives you.
Let him realise he needs to place more emphasis on your relationship
instead of
running to his ex at the slightest opportunity. Time, though, will sort
this mess out and your soon-to-be-IS step-daughter will mellow once she
starts committed dating.
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-him/
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/05/his-ex-wife-still-controls-him/
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