Thursday 2 November 2017

Cheating could make your relationship stronger

Strange But True
Cheating could make your relationship stronger

A relationship expert explains how cheating could make your relationship better and healthier.
A situation like this could push your relationship to a better, stronger phase.play
A situation like this could push your relationship to a better, stronger phase.
 (Jaruma)

No one wants a partner that cheats. It's just as simple as that.

It is obviously better to not be in a relationship than to be in one where people no longer take their commitments seriously and infidelity is almost 70% certain.
What cheating does is to pull your relationship apart and bring in doubts. Once a partner cheats, it becomes hard to trust again to to form a connection as strong as what you had before their eyes strayed, even if it was one time.
However in a stark contrast to what we've always known about cheating and its effect on relationships, a relationship expert claims cheating could make your relationship stronger and better.
Esther Perel, a US based sex and relationship therapist says that cheating helps relationships in a way because it makes people take stock of their marriage.
“Many affairs are break-ups, but some affairs are make-ups,” Perel tells The Guardian. 
The therapist is against infidelity and unfaithfulness among partners but she believes that when it does happen, divorce shouldn’t be the only option. Reconciliation, a chance to patch things up move on from that occurrence should be on the cards.
“I think people should be able to determine for themselves the choices that they will make and the consequences thereof,” she says.
“To just push people to [breakups] and to think that divorce is always the better solution when it dissolves all the family bonds… Entire lives are intertwined with a marriage.”
Perel insists that cheating could help improve a relationship because it makes couples deal with their problems.
“Sometimes the relationship that comes out is stronger, and more honest and deeper than the one that existed before because people finally step up.”

Nigerian men who marry white women for visas

Marriage Scams
Nigerian men who marry white women for visas

There are Nigerian men who marry women just to get visas and immigration papers.
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For papers and visa some Nigerian men marry old white womenplay
For papers and visa some Nigerian men marry old white women 
(Yaba Left Online )

It's a fairly common sight at Ikoyi registry.

We have seen photos of young Nigerian men getting married to white women (usually older). These photos, whenever they pop up online, brings out a general reaction from Nigerians.
The reaction is always one of amusement. You see, we all know what is going on. When a young man exchanges marital vows with a white lady, he is most likely pulling a scam. He is in it for money and the papers and not for love.
Angela Nwachukwu (72) and her Nigerian husband CJ (27)play
Angela Nwachukwu (72) and her Nigerian husband CJ (27) 
(Buzz Nigeria )

This scam has been on since Nigerian men sought for greener pastures in the golden streets of Europe and America. The hook of this scam is to get in contact with a white woman (preferably older). These days this is done online via several dating websites.
The second step is to make her fun in love with you. The third thing to do after she is head over heels for you is to propose. This is when you see these women fly into Nigeria and get married to a young Nigerian hustler at a wedding registry.
Angela Nwachukwu and CJplay
Angela Nwachukwu and CJ 
(Buzz Nigeria )

A few days after tying the knot, the newly wedded couple fly out of the country to start a new life. When they get overseas, London, Seattle, Madrid or wherever, our dear Naija boy flips the script on his naive bride.
The visa hustleplay
The visa hustle 
(Nigerian Eye )

"I met my Nigerian husband in 2008 and brought him here on a K-1 visa in 2009. I thought he loved me by all the sweet words he said, the hundreds of hours on the phone and webcam, messenger....." wrote an American woman who goes by the username Rannk 1 on the forum section of the website Visa Journey.
In 2014, she revealed how she was duped by her Nigerian husband.
"He was on several sites. I was not aware of this until three months later. website subscriptions. He was on several sites. I was not aware of this until three months later" she wrote on the forum.
After chatting up women on numerous dating websites, her Nigerian husband told her he was leaving her on Christmas Eve. "He has ruined my life and my kids' lives. He sucked $15,000 from me overall, he took my youth and beauty, he damaged my relationship with my family, I lost my best friend, he took away all my hope and happiness in life. I regret ever meeting him!!!!" ranted the American lady.
This is a fairly common style of operation for Naija guy who is into marriage visa scams.
In 2015, a British woman Deana Charles told The Sun UK how she was swindled by her Nigerian husband. "He told me he’d only married me for a visa. It explained why he’d been so keen to get me pregnant, the authorities would find it harder to deport him" she revealed.
Ben and Deanaplay
Ben and Deana

It seems nothing will stop some of us from getting that Green Card or visa. What's love when you have the chance to leave Nigeria and reside in Europe or America?
In America, some male African-Americans get married to white women because it is a status symbol. For Nigerian men, it is just another way to make it to the promise land.
All is fair in love and visas.

Ex-President asks Metuh for N1b to appear as witness in fraud trial

Goodluck Jonathan
Ex-President asks Metuh for N1b to appear as witness in fraud trial

Jonathan argued that the order to appear as a witness in court is an attempt to embarrass him.
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Former President Goodluck Jonathanplay
Former President Goodluck Jonathan
 (Punch)

Former President Goodluck Jonathan has asked former National Publicity Secretary of the People's Democratic Party (PDP), Chief Olisa Metuh to pay him the sum of N1 billion to enable him appear as a defence witness in his money laundering trial.

In an application filed before Justice Okon Abang of the Federal High Court in Abuja on Monday, October 30, 2017, the former president argued that the money will be used to cover travelling expenses for himself and his security personnel, from Bayelsa State where he resides. He also mentioned that failure to provide the money means he'll refuse to appear before the court as provided by the constitution.
His application is in response to a subpoena filed by Metuh's lawyer, Dr. Onyechi Ikpeazu (SAN), requiring the former president to appear as a witness in the ongoing trial.
Justice Abang signed the request on Monday, October 23, and required the presence of the former president at the hearing two days later but he failed to appear because he had not been served the notice by the court's bailiff.
In his application on Monday, Jonathan's first prayer to the court sought to set aside the subpoena as he argued that he had no direct link to Metuh and has no knowledge of the charges the defendant is facing.
The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) is prosecuting Metuh and his company, Destra Investments Limited, on a seven-count charge bordering on fraud and money laundering.
The alleged offence involved $2 million and N400 million which the defendants allegedly received from the Office of the NSA, Sambo Dasuki, in 2014.
In his application filed by his counsel, Chief Mike Ozekhome (SAN), Jonathan said that the subpoena is an attempt to embarrass him as it could likely expose him to a criminal charge, penalty or forfeiture.
He argued that the evidence sought to be obtained from the him would amount to an invasion of his privacy, and family life as provided for in Section 37 of the 1999 Constitution (as amended).
The affidavit read, "That he (Jonathan) as the then President of the Federal Republic (2010-2015), appointed ministers and different persons to carry out the day-to-day running of the government activities and such appointees are those who directly related with the President and not third parties, such as the 2nd respondent (Metuh).
"That it is such appointees that can explain daily government's transactions which they directly supervised and not the President who was the overall boss.
"That the 2nd respondent, Olisa Metuh, was never at any time a personal aide or appointee of the applicant.
"That he (Jonathan) knows nothing about the seven charges for which the 1st defendant/ 2nd respondent is standing trial before this court and has absolutely nothing to testify about before this court.
"That he, as a former President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, in the event that this honourable court refuses prayer one on the motion paper, shall require the sum of N1,000,000,000.00 (one billion naira) only, to cover travelling expenses for himself and his security personnel, from his home town Otuoke, in Bayelsa State, to Abuja, and also for logistics, and provision of tight security to cover any period of time that he might spend appearing before this court as President of Nigeria between 2010 and 2015.
"That Chief Mike Ozekhome, SAN, OFR, the lead counsel in this matter, informed me under the same circumstances stated in paragraph 4 above, and I verily believe him, that by virtue of the provisions of section 241(2) of the Administration of Criminal Justice Act, 2015, the applicant is not bound to attend to court except the 2nd respondent herein (Olisa Metuh), who applied for the issuance of subpoena ad testificandum on him, pays for his travelling expenses."
After Jonathan failed to appear before the court on Wednesday, Justice Abang directed the court bailiff to ensure the service of the subpoena on him within five days.
The former president is not the only high profile individual to have turned down an invitation by the court to appear as a witness.
Despite the ruling of the Court of Appeal that ordered for the appearance of detained former National Security Adviser, Sambo Dasuki, as a witness in the trial, the Department of State Service (DSS) failed to produce him in court.
Dasuki's counsel, Mr. Ahmed Raji (SAN), appeared before Justice Abang on Monday, October 23, to oppose the request to compel his client to testify as Metuh's defence witness.
During Wednesday's hearing, Justice Abang dismissed Dasuki's application on the premise that granting it would amount to breach of the Court of Appeal's order which his court cannot review.

Documentary shows what it means to be gay in Nigeria

Homosexuality
Documentary shows what it means to be gay in Nigeria

Wondered what it feels to be gay in Nigeria? Watch this video and find out.
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Homosexuality in Nigeriaplay
Homosexuality in Nigeria
 (meaws)
24/7 Live - Subscribe to the Pulse Newsletter!

Pop culture site VICE released a video about being homosexual in Nigeria.

The video titled 'Being Gay In Nigeria' was published on Sunday, October 29, 2017. The short clip is 2:38 seconds long and it features two men who speak about homosexuality in homophobic Nigeria.
The first man featured in the clip simply goes by the name, Datari, "a fellow Englishman and former stylist to UK boy bands."
These 42 men were caught in the act of homosexuality at a Lagosplay
These 42 men were caught in the act of homosexuality at a Lagos
 (Instagram)

Datari speaks on the anti-gay law in Nigeria and why he has to dress up in a manly way in public. "If you are really camp, then trust me you can't survive in Nigeria,"  he says. 'Camp' is a British slang for when a man acts feminine.
"Why do you think I wear shorts and hats all the time? I want to be butch. I wish I could change my voice because that's like a dead giveaway" says Datari.
3 alleged gay men beaten in Nigeriaplay
3 alleged gay men beaten in Nigeria 
(verastic)

He then goes on to talk about what the average gay person in Nigeria goes through, public persecution and jail. Datari claims some gay Nigerian celebs travel abroad and claim asylum because of the persecution.
LGBT rights activist Bisi Alimi applied for asylum because of persecution in Nigeriaplay
LGBT rights activist Bisi Alimi applied for asylum because of persecution in Nigeria
 (Pulse )

In the second bit of the video, an unidentified Nigerian man who is a hairdresser speaks about his mother's disapproval for his line of profession.
"She was actually telling me it's not a job for a guy. She feels ashamed that her son is touching a woman's hair"  he says.
Further, into the video, the hairdresser admits he experimented with homosexuality but he didn't fancy it. He says he likes women very much.
He claims that there are many influential gay people in the country. "In Nigeria, you will get a lot of connections when you are gay" he claims.

With the Same Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Act of 2013, the punishment for same-sex activity in Nigeria is 14 years.

Fighting depression with two opposite sides of Nigerian music

Ibrahim Magu is a very frustrated man right now

The re-emergence of Maina has become a source of embarrassment and frustration for EFCC boss Magu.
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The Attorney-General of the Federation (AGF), Abubakar Malami (L),  EFCC boss, Ibrahim Magu (R)play
The Attorney-General of the Federation (AGF), Abubakar Malami (L),  EFCC boss, Ibrahim Magu (R)

 (Punch)

Acting Chairman of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC), Ibrahim Magu, cuts a frustrated and dejected figure these days.

He’s unhappy because he can’t fathom how Abdulrasheed Maina, the alleged ‘pension thief’, found his way back into the federal civil service after the EFCC declared him a wanted man in 2013.
Magu is convinced that some very powerful people in government have been providing ample cover for Maina and goading him on.
Abdulrasheed MainaplayEx pension reform boss, Abdulrasheed Maina (Premium Times)

“I really don't know what happened, but I know that he has been properly placed on the watch list and he cannot sneak into this country without the law enforcement agencies, you know, something is wrong somewhere and we need to look at that”, Magu said.
The anti-graft agency boss added that; "I was not in the EFCC as at the time the Maina investigation was conducted".
Magu became acting EFCC boss in November 2015.
Magu has advised Maina to turn himself in for his own good and name his cohorts while at it.
"I advise Maina to come and expose those who are involved because we will go after everybody. I am telling you, we will not spare anybody. Let him come out and expose them. If I'm involved in any way, I should also be exposed.
Shugaban hukumar yaki da rashawaplayIbrahim Magu (The Nation)

"He has people who are protecting him and that has made it difficult for us to get him arrested. You can imagine, he was promoted. It is really devastating, it is beyond my understanding."
Official correspondence now at everyone’s disposal proves that Attorney General Abubakar Malami piled ample pressure on Head of Service Oyo-Ita to have Maina reinstated into the civil service at the Interior Ministry.
Malami and Magu have had public spats and disagreements recently over the prosecution processes of the EFCC.
EFCC insiders tell Pulse that Magu has grown increasingly frustrated at the lack of inter-agency cooperation in the fight against corruption.
Former chairman of the Presidential Task Force on Pension Reforms, Abdulrasheed MainaplayAbdulrasheed Maina (Nigerian Monitor)

“It’s as if we are alone in this”, one EFCC source disclosed.
As the Maina debacle continues to grip the nation, Magu has instructed his men to sink their claws into the case of the former pension boss; with all they’ve got.
Meanwhile, Maina is still on the run.